Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
