Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
ok first of all what the fuck
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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