I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
