i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
