So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
