Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
