his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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