And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
