windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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