He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
