Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize