I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Randomize