found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
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