We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
