We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
So I just went to clothing optional bar
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
