I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
