You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
