wat bout pragnant strippers??
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
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i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Randomize