I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize