He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Randomize
