It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
We're too hungover to prance.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
