It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
