I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
