I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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