i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...i went into my mom's room to say goodnight and i don't remember anything...she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and i go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and i said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then i capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
3 2 1 whiskey
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
I woke up under a house in Key West
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