guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Randomize
