i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
