you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
We were destined to go to rehab together
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I have aggressive nipples.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Randomize
