Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
