The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
