weddingsv make me drug and hornr
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
