guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
