If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
