It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
