this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Someone shattered a urinal.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize