are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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