carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
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