I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Randomize
