And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Randomize
