I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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