I feel great
I just peed on a car
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
i love accidental penises.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
