I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
the day after is always just damage control
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
They took my balls.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
Randomize
