I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Randomize
