He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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