and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
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