Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
