This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
