He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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