i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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