I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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