Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
